Wednesday

Today I Had over 20 fashion induced heart attacks.

The. United. States. Of. America.Is. The . Best. Place.To. Shop.
My Today goes a little like this. Last night i went to bed, but an epic battle inbetween James and i ensured that HE got the big bed and i got the ridiculous single. I love the house, its a gorgeous location, likened to the golden mile, and huntington beach is an amazing area to live. I lay in bed a while, in the fear that 2 armed men would come tumbling through my window and shoot me as a lay defencless in my single bed. there are lots of guns in america, and i fear we may be shot any moment. made dad check the locks, many had broken, so the next morning we had to call a locksmith. did i mention that the amenities and services in america are fantastic?
had great great sleep, but woke similtaneously with famdogga at 2am, curse you, international dateline. the next morning, after my battle with the floppy showerhead, the martins (aleeeexxiissss) arrived at 11. they were staying a little while away, and i was very much impressed by their dodge. vipperrrrr. we have a giant cadillaac or something. (sarah much? sarah?) anyway. we went out for breakfast, it was cold, but not freezing. like melbourne weather. ya'll feel it? we met ross's college friend rob (pronouced "raab" with amez accent) and he took us to a little cafe/diner called the sugar shack. alexis and i dubiously studied current american trends, every single teenage girl in the state of california is wearing..uggboots. down under much? raab is very fit and loves car has a shiney smile. he was helpful though, he gav kim, mother, alexis and i directions to a huge popular mall (read: shopping center.everybody laughed as i called it a shopping centre). at the sugar shack i had poached eggs, and i learnt my first lesson, 'lemonade' is not sprite, its lemon squash. i was apalled and horrified when the waiter offered james 'jelly' with his french toast, i jumped in rudely with "god no james you can't have jelly what on earth were you thinking its early! (splutter with indignation)"turns out it was jam. eh. i knew that, i swear ive been to the states before... (but you wouldnt know it). went into shoe store, picked up nice pair of heels. before i contnue to read the price, i will attempt to explain my ungodly and tragic obsesson with shoes. i dont know why, i love them. they are the best part of an outfit. i see a shoe store and i cannot help it. i loveee them. and the states have the most stylish shoes. i pick up shoes. i turn shoes over. shoes 50$. i look for a one, as in 150$. no 1. turned to shriek and shake alexis. and this was my first of many encounters.
dropped james + kelly + andrew at home. romantic much?
dad and ross and raab go to buy car.
mum , kim, alexis and i do what my every intention from god is to do. to shop.
and shop we do. we hit the 405 ( americas road system is stunningly good. they have handy traffic lights draped overhead, huge intersections, concrete roads, and street names on huge green signs. and plenty of freeways. but thats just CA).
we get to a massive shopping center, like chadstone actually. it has high fashion, including chanel, balenciaga, gucci, hermes, prada, louis vuitton, balmain, P/S, plus many others that my fashion quenched brain cannot recall. and, it was the benefits of stores like banana republic, hollister, abercrombie and fitch, zara, gap, gant, banana republic, victorias secret, jimmy choo, nine west, steve maddern, other good stuff.
its fair to say i lost my mind. just like mum lost hers when she realised they had a store that stocked salvatorre ferragamo. that was mad.
the minute we walked in i actually had heart palpitations. actually, the first store i saw was oliliy, the last olily or something, which reminded me of zoe. my eyes were wide an bright as i took in the beautiful bright, light, new, modern, calming 'mall'. then we got a photo infront of a carousel of reindeer. in australia, we have the 25th and then its all over.in the US christmas goes till new years. then, i noticed something. there was a FEMALE foot locker and A MALE footlocker. hoe rofs is that? mum went in to see nike airs for james. 50$. new season. i was sick on foot lockers floor. kiddding.
went upstairs, saw shoe store and died. went in. died some more, because THERE WAS A PAIR OF SHOES ORGINALLY FOR 110$US. THEN, THEYWERE REDUCED TO 50, AND THEN SOME MORE, TO 25$. so i bought them. bootiful. tan, high, straps, love. also was a nude strappy pair, also 35. tried shoes on, bought shoes. and you know what? i could pay with a 50$ note. too cool. too happy. and then my liver stopped functiong. and my brain shriveled up in its cranium and supressed a long, long hour or 2 in which i marched into victorias secret. at this point, my humble hemispheres stopped to allow my body an hour of ultimate joy. and that was my victorias secret experience in one. i was more like a kid in a candy store. i was like a kid in willy wonkas freaking factory. alexis and i wondered in, through the wrong door actually, becuase itss huuuugeeeee. tons of people inside, and i was like a magpie, going for anything bright and shiny. the. bras. are. incredible. and. so. comfortable. i wanted everything. everything. lost alexis, found her later rhymitcally and obsessively going through the too die for cute underwear. i joined her, and we did at least 3 laps of the underwear section. she and i couldnt communicate, only through lifting up amazing lingerie and grunting in approval. never disapproval. there was nothing to disapprove of. i know this post is long. i dont care. you need to know. my 5 dear, dear followers, YOU NEED TO KNOW. sarah, thought of sarah the entire time. you would love it, panda. i actually dug for my phone and brashfully ingored all international dialing costs but the time differ is fucked and i know your sick so i decided not to wake you. mum and kim,meanwhile,were losing their minds over prada sunglasses. a pair of which my mum bought. we share the gene.
the followed us into victorias secret. they squelaed too.they mimicked our virgil of running from each section, the try on pile growing all the while. cued for changerooms. changerooms sophisticated. an hour and a half later i have a huge bag FULL of victorias secret stuff. and thats only trip one. stop for quick pep up starbucks. have awkward conversation with starbucks man, whom, though goodlooking, cannot get my name right. takes long time and many, many spelling attepts. the gave up at louise.
moved on, this time to zara. um love.love love love. though of zof every minute. i know she adores zara. i couldnt stop.wanted everything, EVERTHING. next door was banana republic, which i also died in. their current designer needs a medal. bought a denimy shirt thing, which is sooo fantastic and sooo versatile. the kim+mum+me+alexis team work well together, we all grab something,double in change rooms and all compare. mum and i bought a slouchy wool gray cardigan, i love, like a thousand times over.
next stop united colours of benetton, which was also hot to trot.
and then another absoloutly breathtaking store whose name escapes me, but it was bloody huge and popular. you'd know it..if i can rememer it.
then we went to abercrombie and fitch, which believe it or not isn't those hundreds of tshirts you see around, it had barely any jumpers, it was really fashionable stuff. like sportsgirl, but warmer and a nicer quality. i wanted this military jacket thing but it was 100$ and in the us we consider that expensive. reaaly wanted this handknitted grey vest but i have too many vests. dont worry,vest i shall return. alexis wet mental in a+f, she loved it.
went to other stores, it was all a crazy blur. hermes beautiful.so getting tan bag, your mine.
girlies, there is so much of that blue and white stripe stuff you see in sportgirl. like that but nicer, better quality, cheaper and with more variety. bless you, LA, bless you.
finally, we had to go :(:(:(:( my saddest hour. but i vowed to return, and return i will.
hopped in huge but trusty viper, with experienced kim at the wheel we shot off home. i mean this, the speed limits in the state of california are through the roof. scray fast.
came home, ate pizza, planned tomorrow at disneyland.
HAPPY NEW YEARS MELBOURNE!!!!
i hope you have an absoloutely amazing time and i miss you all dearly.
you wouldnt believe it based on the post, but i do :)
love you all very much, i hope youre all out lovin' new years.
and hows this, they have this chain of resturants called the 'outback adventure'. they think its australia. no,love, no.

2 comments:

  1. and i thought my posts where long...........


    it felt like i was reading a short novel on fashion

    ReplyDelete
  2. YOU BITCH
    my other adoring fans love it.

    ReplyDelete